How well do I know myself?

Just some crap before I head to bed. I have been thinking quite a lot these few days. People around me sees me happy as I'm putting on my smiles, pretending things are going on very well for me. But who knows, behind those smiles, what I'm going through is putting me into a dilemma. Nowadays, I really don't know what I want, what's right, what's wrong, what should be done or what I should not be doing. Maybe things are getting complicated.

I'm someone who love to question. 'What if this, What if that??" And this leads me to do a stupid mistake by asking a question which I already know the answer and this answer will definitely disappoint me but yet I still ask for it. I don't know why I have such urge in me. It's like you are trying to test your heart, wondering how strong your heart can be when you get the answer. Hmmm...does this happened to anyone out there? Or is just me? 

Have you guys ever go through a situation that you are very angry at one person on his/her action but at the same time you are actually blaming yourself instead of putting the blame on that person? I did. The next thing I know I'm actually angry at myself. Then, I cried on my stupidity. I often tell myself that when one door closes, there's always a window open for me. I always believe that as life is full with choices, it's just about what you choose and which way you want. I wouldn't say that I regret on any of the choices I made as I'm happy with whatever i get today. But right now, the situation is, you know you are heading into a hole, but you still want to go for it. And  the interesting part is, the road to the hole is wayyyyyy toooooooo bumpy. I think that's what they called "THE UPS AND DOWNS"

Anyway, that's all on my stupidity crap on my blog. It's late and I shall sleep. Happy Raya Day! Enjoy the holidays! =) ♥

Blessed!

One blue Saturday! Started my last day in the month June feeling down and moody. Oh well.. I guess I woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

Forget whatever I'm moody about but what I'm trying to blog is I'm actually blessed with friends that love me so much. I'm happy to have them and this is how they cheer me up when they know I'm down =)

♥

Just right after this message, I received an email. And he did make my first smile of the day! =)

4 days ago, I was down with flu, sore throat and fever. That is why I'm the sleeping panda. Then I had Maggi for my lunch and now I'm the 4 hours later Panda! XD

*smell my foot!!*

Thanks for all the supports and the love you guys given me..really appreciate it and you guys really cheer me up!!! Love you tonnes! ♥

Distance

Looking back at the very last post that I blogged, it was about half year ago. I guess it's time for me to start all over again. I miss blogging. Yes I do but I'm just lazy, I remember I started blogging so that I can move on from my past relationship. Looking back at those old posts, I do look silly, don't I? Anyway, new post, new start, new beginning. Move on is what I should do. Let's start with a song, simple but yet it brings out a thousand words.

If you go through the lyrics of "Distance", this song really touches my heart. How many of you really found the perfect one? I don't mean that the love you all having now is not true but how much did it hit the point that you all will say "She/He is the right one! I'm so gonna have her/him and no one else in my life!". Well, I bet everyone did say this line before and the next few months it turns out to be someone else?

Well, I'm someone realistic. Maybe because I've been disappointed for few times, I don't really believe in fairy tales anymore. Loving someone is not easy. Loving someone at a correct timing is even harder. And not everyone will have the chance to do it. So why not appreciate what you have? What you really like? And what you really love? 

"Distance" is a song about loving someone at the wrong time in your life. It could be too soon or it could be too late, but never the less it's about being around the one whom your heart longs for but without showing your true feelings to them. So what can you do if you sit in such situation?

 Keep your distance?

The sun is filling up the room, 

and I can hear you dreaming. 

Do you feel the way I do? Right now. 

I wish we would just give up,

'cause the best part is falling. 

Call it anything but love. 

And I will make sure to keep my distance. 

Say I love you, and you're not listening. 

And how long can we keep this up? up, up. 

Please don't stand so close to me, 

I'm having trouble breathing. 

I'm afraid of what you'll see right now. 

I give you everything I am, all my broken heartbeats, until I know you'll understand. 

And I will make sure to keep my distance. 

Say I love you, and you're not listening. 

And how long can we keep this up? up, up, up. 

And I keep waiting for you to take me. 

You keep waiting to say what we have. 

So I'll make sure to keep my distance. 

Say I love you, and you're not listening. 

And how long can we keep this up? up, up, up. 

Make sure to keep my distance. 

Say I love you, and you're not listening. 

How long 'till we call this love, love, love?